It's funny how people believe that spending time in the Word and in prayer only draws us closer to God, but would you believe me when I tell you that it also draws the devil closer to you?
Read Saint Matthew 4, when Jesus was on fasting but that did not stop the devil from doing his deeds.
If I am being honest, I do not know how to handle conflict in a professional manner, so as much as possible, I try to avoid it. Not necessarily the best method because what happens when its unavoidable?
I am a very quiet person and this also makes me an avid observer. There are times when people forget that I'm in the room when they say and do things they don't really want a third party involved in.
Therefore, I have the power to withhold nothing when the time comes to fire and to always hit my target.
But seeing people hurting, hurts me, so even when I have the opportunity to do damage, I'm reluctant to. Hence, I've learnt that being as quiet as possible, works for me.
So when conflict does arise, I only have one option...stay quiet and hold back my tears for as long as I can.
I've learnt that crying does not make me weak. I've cried for 90% of my childhood and looking back, if I did not cry, I would not be alive today.
There is this saying "wherever pressure builds, it will burst."
If someone has been on my nerves for a while, best know that there is some build up and the fire rate will be similar to that of a machine gun. If I'm crying during or after a conflict, it's because I'm withholding myself from causing hurt. Be glad I'm bursting out in tears and not bursting out in flames.
A few attempts at getting on my nerves will never cause me to make a comeback but that does not mean I won't retaliate because I do not like being treated without respect.
I was raised to keep my mouth shut especially when an adult disrespects me.
Now, who raises a child like that? I'm just supposed to be a pushover, right? I should only respect my elders but they should not respect me, right?!
Did you know you can stop something from happening multiple times by putting an end to it the first time it happens? I wish people understood this.
I am no longer a child, which makes me less reluctant to withhold myself because I'm now my opponent's match...an adult!
After I got fired up and ready to respond, for a moment I did not care what Jesus thought about me. This was my opportunity to finally get my piece out because I did not want to tolerate this abuse for much longer.
But after I cooled down, I realized how impulsive my actions would have been had I followed through and spoken out. I realized at a certain point, that I was not dealing with people, but something behind the scenes. "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood..." - Ephesians 6:12
Some people are literally the devil's partners. These people will get on your nerves no matter what you do.
I believe the best way to avoid conflict is to stay prayerful, stay in the Word and to know your limits!
Walking away does not mean you should tolerate disrespect.
If you feel you are about to lose your composure, you do not have to wait until the conversation ends before you walk away. "I do not like how you are speaking to me, so I will take my leave now."
You can walk away if you feel you cannot control yourself, because your reaction will only add fuel to their fire. "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." - James 4:7
No matter what, as children of the Most High, we should always be respectful!
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